Who I am? Nikolle Fonseca - 10B - July 2021.

I’m Nikolle Fonseca, I was born in Bogotá-Colombia on October 27th and I’m 15 years old, so I’m a 05 line. Now, I live in Cartagena, so you probably ask why or how I came here, so let me tell you about me and the reasons why I live in Cartagena. I really love Bogotá, I had a good childhood and I share a lot with my mom. She's the person who always lives with me, just sometimes we had to live with some of my relatives.

Nazaret was the school where I studied. It was a cool school, with a lot of fields, backyards and a pretty classy/fancy library (I remember loved that library with my life, I spent enough time to be called a nerdy). However, even if the school was fresh and lovely, my social life wasn’t. Yes, I had friends, but they weren't loyal friends, so basically I didn’t have some people of that type. Sometimes, they were indifferent, too cold or just treated me badly, but despite that I was too afraid to separate myself from them. Sometimes, thinking at night, I thought the “affection” I received was enough to tolerate the bad actions. Maybe thinking like that is insane. Yes, I agree, but it was normal, I mean, in the school,I was a little bit problematic, severe problems with controlling emotions (anger mostly) so only with them being near to me tell me that was all I needed.

As you have noticed, that was the first reason I left the city. I had a really bad social life and of course, my mom received a job in her hometown. Cartagena is a memorable and important city for me. Here, I met my best friend, my first loyal friend. I remember, I met her in the new school, we were in a conference and she approached me and gave me a welcome drawing. At that moment I hoped that the relationship that was just beginning, stayed with me for a long time. And well, it came true, she and I are still best friends and trust me, she is a loyal friend, not like something I had before.

Problems came again. Yes, I had/have really good friends, however, things like: culture shock, the jokes about my accent, even from teachers and my mom working 24/7, affected me. Things

like mental disorders/illness, you never think will happen to you. But, hey, they are here and punch you like a truck. I don’t say why disorders are specific, I pretty reserved with these things, but it was and it is something to fight everyday.

At my worst, I always thought coming to Cartagena was the big mistake my mom and I made.

All the time, seriously, I always blamed Cartagena for all the things that happened to me at that

moment and I missed Bogotá, because Bogota looked like the prevention for my mental illness.

Don’t get me wrong, I still missed Bogotá. Of course, most of my short life was there, but now, I

don’t think my hometown is the escape or the prevention of my problems and in the same way

Cartagena isn’t the detonation. Things just needed to happen, no matter where I live.

Now, I learn how to deal with the most problems of my life. I deserve to have good friends, friends who treat me well and love me like I do, even if I’m not the best person on the earth. We need to change, sometimes clothes and other times, we need to change the places where we live. All these things are experiences, experiences can be a part of our formation and be the best of us day by day, even if the experiences break us, they have something to bring, so don’t be mean with yourself, try to accept that some situations we can’t erase or escape from them. So, the only thing we can do is give our best for that moment and try to not experience them again.